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We create our distress by wanting things different from the way they are.
Transcript:
This is about distress, and what we’ll call “distress” is: not feeling wonderful, in the moment.
So, here’s a look at how it is that we don’t feel good in the moment. As we’ve said so often, it’s based in the mind. The mind is saying it should feel like this, it’s not feeling like this, so we feel distressed. We feel that we should be more something, or less something. Now, the technique, the trick, the knack is (you’ve heard this often) to be in the moment, just as it is, now.
Now, the mind isn’t happy with that. The mind says whatever it says, it should be, or it shouldn’t be. What I’m attempting to share is: if you are only in this moment, just as it is, and you disconnect from listening to the mind, then everything is as it is. And in each way, it’s perfect. (That probably doesn’t say it, does it?)
Being in the moment. Be here now. This is it. Every moment is the first moment of your life. All these things you’ve heard so often. And they are saying it. Just being…here…now. And yes, the mind says this and that. It should be, it could be…but the fact is, it is the way it is. Now. It always is. So, the moment is as it is. And we create our distress by either wanting, or thinking, it should be different from the way it is. What is. It is the way it is, now. Just to be here, now. And that does include the mind saying whatever it’s saying. And you don’t have to listen.
But it’s tempting, isn’t it? You keep–a little thought goes past, and you tag yourself onto it, and off you go. What I’m suggesting is: it’s as if you’re sitting in a cinema, looking at the screen, and your thoughts come in. Let’s say they’re coming in from the right, going across the screen, and out on the left. Coming in from the right, going out on the left. But, we don’t let them go out on the left, they come in, and we grab them. “We should be, it could be, it ought to be, I should be different.”
Now, that leads us to, where did we get these ideas from? When we have so many ideas about how it’s supposed to be? That are given us from this religion, and that religion, and this spiritual practice, and that one, and our teachers, and our parents, and our…they’re all different. But, roughly, they’re the same. And that is: “Don’t be who you are in this very moment.” You’re wrong, unless you match up to these standards, which, the people that are telling you are not matching up to the standards. Christians say, “Take no thought of tomorrow.” That’s what the Bible says, but how many Christians do you know? “Take no thought of tomorrow.” “Unless you leave your father, mother, and sisters and brothers…” How many Christians do you know are living up to that?
So, we’re filled with all this stuff. And we’re never ourselves, just as we are. Somebody says, “Come to the party,” and your thought of the party is noise, and people, and this, and that…you don’t want to go. “Ah, but I should, I’m not being…” or “I should be there, or…” Instead of: Listen. “But then my friends won’t ask me next time, and then…” Listen. Listen to yourself. What do you want? What’s the most comfortable, the most harmonious? For you, now. You don’t feel like meeting people? In comes the mind, and says all that stuff. If you don’t feel like meeting people, don’t meet them!
Dare to be yourself. Hardly ever happens! And when people do dare to be themselves–they call them the “mavericks”–they’re called eccentric, or mad, but they’re usually the people that bring in something new. They’re the innovators. They’re the ones that go out on the edge. But not to be on the edge; they’re just doing their thing, just being themselves. Just check in your life: how often are you giving yourself permission just to be you? To do what you want to do? To say what you want to say? And listen: to feel what you’re feeling? To allow the thoughts to be there. We’re talking about you being you. You’re not supposed to be like anybody else. Your fingerprints aren’t! Most of you…even identical twins are not identical! And you’re trying to be like somebody else! And not allowing yourself to be uniquely you. Uniquely you.
When you get up to the pearly gates, when you get to heaven, they’re not going to say, “You weren’t like Jesus, you weren’t like Buddha, you weren’t like this, you weren’t like that.” It’s going to be: “Were you you?” You are totally unique, you’re not supposed to be like anyone else. Be you. In each moment. I dare you! Just for a day! Keep listening: “Who do I want to be now? Where do I want to be now? What do I want to do now?”
And honor that. Be honest with that. “What do I want to say now?” Say it. Disconnect from what you think are consequences, ‘cause the consequences aren’t what you think. When you allow yourself to be you, you’re free. And until you’re free, you don’t know what freedom is. You see it as the opposite of being a prisoner in some, but it’s not opposite to anything. It’s something you can’t imagine, until you’re in that space. You have a Satori, time stands still, there’s time no more. You have that facility, but every time you do something for somebody else, it’s not for somebody else, it’s for you, in order that they see you the way you want to be seen.
Dare to be you!
In each moment.